Friday, November 17, 2017

Release Clutter And Nourish Your Soul Part 1 Environmental Clutter



Let today be the day you learn the grace of letting go and the power of moving on. Steve Maraboli

Some people are never concerned with getting empty boxes to pack up clutter for the trash collectors. God bless 'em. But others of us live our lives overrun with all kinds of clutter. It's not something we do deliberately. We just don't put things where they belong in the first place, and they pile up. We have good intentions, but we take stuff for granted and pretend it's not there.

Clutter is stuck energy. The word "Clutter" derives from the Middle English word "clotter" which means to coagulate--and that's about as stuck as you can get. Karen Kingston.

Everything is energy, and energy attracts like energy. So if your life is full of clutter, more clutter is what you'll attract. And it creeps up gradually when you're not looking. Over time, it meshes together like part of the decor. And it becomes part of your everyday life. You may try to change your focus away from it. But the clutter is still there.

People clutter for different reasons. Some allow 'memories' to pile up with old pictures, souvenirs, reminders of happy times, etc. Others accumulate stuff and plan to 'get to it later' like unread mail and greeting cards, receipts that need filing, etc. Others think they might 'need something later' like ads for things on sale, old clothes they'll never wear, the hat for that outfit they never bought. Then there's the messy person who just lets everything pile up.


Our home environment is a reflection of who we think we are, and clutter becomes a part of that reflection. We identify with it. So the clutter influences the way we feel and takes a toll on our health. It can invite dust, or molds, and toxins that affect us physically, draining our energy and our ability to fight illnesses. Looking at clutter everyday can also encourage mental and emotional stress that disturbs our sense of well being with feelings like incompetence, anxiety, and depression. And our home may no longer support a positive self-image or what we need to be healthy and happy.

If you're a chronic clutterer, your brain is trained for it. But you can re-train your brain and create a new way to live. Clutter has some meaning for each person, and it's important to understand why you clutter. So ask yourself, "Why do I allow clutter in my home? And what reward do I get from it?" You might answer, "I allow it to pile up because I can get to it later, or I keep it because I might need it sometime." And my reward is "I don't have to do it now, or I'll have it if I need it." Now make a decision to release your need to clutter, and make an appointment with yourself to begin clutter maintenance.

It's all about finding the calm in the chaos. Donna Karan 

Get a box for trash and a bag for give-a-ways, and make notes to yourself to stay with a schedule to the end. Clean one area at a time like one drawer, one closet, one pile of papers, etc. Keep only what's meaningful like pictures, letters, mementos, etc, and what's necessary like medical reports, unpaid bills, etc. But let all the rest go. And with each job you finish, see yourself as strong and capable. It may take more than one attempt to change for good. So keep reminders in those areas you've cleaned, and maybe you won't clutter again. :-)

When you're done, stand back and look around. Smile at what you've accomplished, and you'll feel a new energy in your home. And now that you've cleared the clutter on the outside, take a moment to go within and tell yourself you'll clear the inside clutter too.

Stay tuned for Part 2 next week to release your inside clutter and find peace.


I wish you happy days in your clutter free home. And maybe your car too?

Marilyn

Saturday, November 11, 2017

Better Late Than Never


Hello, Dear Readers,

Sorry I haven't been around for a while, but due to a bout with illness, I just couldn't make it. And this being Veteran's Day, I especially wanted to remember our veterans with an article. Didn't make that either. But I do want to express my heartfelt gratitude to all the men and women who served our country with their love and dedication. And if you know a veteran, let him/her know you care. Thank you.

Now since I couldn't get an article ready, I'm offering a little poem on a different subject that I wrote a long time ago.

Laugh A Little. It's Good For You.

Although I hurt a lot inside,
I sometimes joke and find a laugh.
It comes from yet another place
Along my weary path.

It usually comes up suddenly,
And takes its rightful place.
It stays around a little while
To fill the empty space.

Laughter drives away the tears,
And calms the hurt below.
It frees my soul to feel alive
Where I think angels go.

God knew I'd need this useful tool
To lift me high above the dark,
So I can see the truth of life,
And find that vital spark.

Thank you, Lord, for quips and giggles,
For making light of strife and pain,
For finding fun in spite of trial
To find my joyful way again.

I wish you a beautiful laugh whenever you need one.

Marilyn

Friday, October 20, 2017

Have You Discovered Your Life Purpose? And Are You Living It Now?



Efforts and courage are not enough without purpose and direction. John F. Kennedy

Most of us get a job, work hard, pay bills, solve problems, have some fun with family and friends, participate in spiritual activities, and keep our lives moving. But if you're one of those, do you ever get a feeling maybe there's something more, something you're missing in your life? That feeling is a part of you inside that reaches out to your conscious awareness with a message you might want or need to know. There's more to you than what you've seen so far.

Your life has purpose. Your story is important. Your dreams count. Your voice matters. You were born to make an impact. Unknown

Each of us is born with a special purpose for our life, and something inside longs to express who we are and our reason for being here. But we seldom think consciously about such things. We know that life is a mixture of positive and negative experiences, and we prefer the positive. But how often do we actually think about or own role in helping to create a happier world? In thousands of ways our world needs help, but do you ever contemplate ways in which you might express something beneficial to others in your own special way? Hmm... What would you express? Think about it.

The things that excite you are not random. They are connected to your purpose in life. Follow them. Unknown

We're all endowed with talents, or gifts, things we enjoy and do well that are connected to our life purpose. And we bring these talents with us into our life to fulfill our purpose. But we don't always recognize them as blessings that give our life meaning. And sometimes we take our talents for granted and minimize their value with an attitude that says, "Oh, that's nothing. Anybody can do that." But no two people can do anything exactly alike, because what each person does is very special and cannot be duplicated.

Some of us express our talents in seemingly small, insignificant ways...smiles and hugs help heal a broken heart, being a good listener validates others, repairing children's bikes brings them pleasure, etc. With others, talents can be reflected in one's type of work...teachers, physical therapists, nurses, etc. Millions of talents, all equal in importance, all blessing someone in some way. How vital each person is in our world. And most don't realize that the good they do is an expression of their life purpose.

The meaning of your life is to find your gift. The purpose of your life is to give it away. Pablo Picasso

We discover our talents in different ways at different times in our life. And sometimes they're even discovered through a painful experience. I once had a patient who suffered with a back injury and felt his life was useless. He knew nothing of talents and life purpose. But he loved nature, and one day he discovered he could lay on the ground propped up on one side and grow a garden with one hand. Then his mood changed to happiness as he fulfilled his life purpose making others happy supplying beautiful flowers to hospitals and anyone who wanted a bouquet...including me.

If you can't figure out your purpose, figure out your passion. For your passion will lead you right into your purpose. Bishop T. D. Jakes


You may not know your purpose in life, and when you ask yourself why you're here, you may have no answers. But if you know your talent and bring it to its rightful importance, you'll see the connection. Then use it and claim your own happiness fulfilling your purpose. If you don't know your talent, start noticing something you really enjoy doing, and you do it well. It could be your work, a hobby, a pastime, etc. Listen to the voice inside that says, "There. That's it. That's why you're here." And move through your life fulfilling your purpose with a happy heart.

I wish you happiness as you discover your self.


Marilyn

Friday, October 13, 2017

The Sea Of Life. Are You The Ocean?


Dear Readers, I live near the ocean, and sometimes when I look at that vast body of water, I think of the multitude of water droplets it takes to create the oceans, and I think of all the people it takes to create our world. We are the world. But it seems we've lost our sense of who we are in the great sea of humankind. I remember when we created our world together, each a part of that creation. But today we live with an 'us and them' mentality, and we deny our belonging to each other. I feel sad. Today I want to share an article I posted a few years ago on this subject.

The Sea Of Life


Yesterday I spent the day at a hospital with a friend who had surgery. I've been in many hospitals in the past, but this experience made what I already knew more real to me. Each of us is unique, traveling our own individual journey through life, but at the same time part of the great whole that makes us the human race. It's kind of like each unique drop of water being part of the whole body we call the ocean. And the ocean is not the ocean without each drop.
Individually, we are one drop. But together we are an ocean. Rhunosuke Satoro

While my friend was in surgery, I wandered up and down the halls. I've always been a people-watcher, but yesterday I was more keenly aware of everyone and everything I came across. I saw people in wheelchairs or walking with canes while others walked straight and tall. I saw a nurse consoling a woman who was crying, and I noticed a beautiful little boy grinning at me. I saw people in pain and heard their moans, while medical personel saw to their needs. Contrasts everywhere. Yet, in their humanness, they were all a part of each other.
Later I went outside of the building and found a concrete ledge where I sat down. I took off my shoes and rested my bare feet on mother earth, while little ants scampered around as if they knew where they were going. The sun was warm, but there was a cool breeze under the big oak tree where I sat watching a black crow scrounging for his lunch in the dirt near by. Once in a while someone sat next to me. Some were happy. Some were not. But each had a story to tell--a unique story, yet part of all the stories that portray who we are. 

Life is like the ocean. It can be calm or still, and rough and rigid, but in the end, it is always beautiful. Unknown

 As the day moved on, the hospital became a microcosm of the bigger world, and I became more increasingly aware of life and our connection with each other. We each know sadness and joy, pain and bliss, feast and famine, love and hate, lack and plenty, illness and health--everything in the human experience. And we're never alone in any of it. While we're going through something, another person somewhere else is going through the same thing in their own unique way. How sad we don't claim the ocean in which we swim. It's really quite a beautiful ocean in spite of the differences we believe separate us.


 I'm grateful for this hospital experience. It reminded me we're much more than what we see in the mirror. In essence, Mother Teresa says, "We know that what we are doing is only a drop in the ocean. But if the drop were not there, the ocean would be missing something." You serve an important part in the sea of life, and your unique presence helps maintain the sea in which you live. Love yourself, and pour your love out to others. And claim the beautiful ocean in which you swim. It is your home.
I wish you much happiness on your journey.

Marilyn

Saturday, October 7, 2017

Are You Living Images And Roles You Were Given As A Child? Where Is Your True Self? Part 2



Your essence is within you. You are already enough. Debbie Spellman

For the most part, each day we automatically live our life without thinking past our usual activities. But we're complex beings, and our role, image, and personality are so ingrained from childhood, we don't usually question our identity. Personality becomes our 'I am' and, for many, that satisfies a need to know. But it doesn't even touch the great dimensions of all that you are. Self-knowledge is one of our greatest tools to discover and uncover our true self, and use this self for good. The more you know about yourself, the better you're able to choose what to keep and what to release to promote what you want your life to be.

We express from personality and from our true self, and the two are quite different. Personality is changeable, and can have different opinions about itself. One day you're a very bright person, and the next day you're pretty stupid. Or decisions you make via personality can backfire and reveal parts of you that you'd rather not have. But there's nothing wrong with expressing from personality. You can learn a lot about yourself from this source of expression.

People apply different meanings to the true self, such as authentic, true nature, deeper or higher self, the core of your being, soul, etc. But it is considered the real you, as you were created. And the essence of you cannot be something different. You are you, and you will always be you.

Somewhere tucked away inside each of us is a memory of the self that existed during childhood before we fully assumed a role, an image, a personality. And part of us longs to recapture that time of innocence when we knew our true self well. With purposeful steps toward change, we can dim some of personality's hold on us, and know more of our true self.

It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are. E. E. Cummings

Intention is one of our most powerful tools for change. And when it stems from the good in your heart, it will bring good into your life. Use intention with desire, willingness, commitment, and faith to change. Reinforce these qualities each day, and with your deep feelings to move forward, your courage will be there. No need to hurry. Change comes gradually over time.


Once you establish your decision for change, you need to begin listening. How often do you listen to how your personality thinks and notice what it does? What do you feel is positive and negative about it? What does it tell you about yourself, and do you agree with it? We're taught to believe that personality is who we are. But do you ever sense that you're more than this belief? Pay attention, and learn to recognize this part of you.

Intuition is the voice of the soul. The more you listen, the more you know your true self. James Van Braagh

Clarify your meaning of true self, who and what you are within, and listen to it speak to you. Our true self speaks to us often, but with our busy minds, we miss a lot of its messages. It's uplifting, and will always guide us with love and wisdom. But we have to hear it. Seek ways to communicate with and express your true self. Play like a child, show kindness to others, claim your own worth.


The goal of this change is not to erase personality, but to release the traits you don't want, and allow it to compliment your true self, so the two can work together for your good. As days pass and you increase your knowledge and understanding, you'll learn to tell if something is coming from personality or your true self. And you will gradually learn to decrease more of personality and increase more of your true self.

This is a vast subject, and mounds of material have been written in detail about who you are, and how to discover and nurture more of you. You're on a journey of self-discovery. Read, research, express gratitude, and be your beautiful self.

I wish you joy as you blossom into more of who you really are.

Marilyn

Friday, September 29, 2017

Are You Living Images And Roles You Were Given As A Child? Where Is Your True Self? Part 1


When children come into the world, they come in with unique characteristics and talents. And the fortunate ones have parents, teachers, caregivers, who nurture and encourage them to express these gifts in their life. As they mature, they experience many of the same rules and restrictions the world requires, but with direction and guidance, they retain much of their authentic self. As they grow up and develop their personality, these gifts become part of their identity, and they're allowed to freely express them as part of who they are.

How wonderful if all children were so fortunate. But we live in a busy world and, to some degree, each child is given a role, or image, to identify as 'self'. Children grow up in group settings, and are tagged early-on within the group. They're given a role, and this is who they must be. This is not generally a conscious or purposeful act, but it can be verbally assigned by others, assigned by the child, or sometimes just seem to happen. But as this image takes hold, it becomes the child's perception of self. The role, or image, becomes the child's 'I am'.

"God has given you one face, and you make yourself another." William Shakespear

I was 6 years old when my father died, and my mother assigned roles to my 11 year old brother and me. My older brother became man of the family and worked to help support us, and I became my mother's trash dump. My mother came home from her waitress job in the middle of the night having had too much to drink, and she woke me to listen to long, painful stories about years past and then losing my father. I tried to help her, but my role was too much for a 6 year old, especially dealing with my own painful loss. No one listened to my pain, and I felt forsaken, so I made a vow to take care of myself and never need anyone. I'd labeled myself, and my vow became who I was...independent, self-sufficient, and alone. This episode is described in my book, Silent Echoes.

From our roles, or images, we develop our personality. According to the World Book Encyclopedia, personality is the personal or individual quality that makes one person be different and act differently from another. In psychology, personality is the total physical, intellectual, and emotional structure of an individual, including abilities, interests, and attitudes. According to Maxwell Maltz, the self-image is the key to human personality and human behavior. Change the self-image and you change the personality and the behavior. We are truly complex beings with no two alike.


Whatever people think of you is really about the image they have of you, and that image isn't you. Don Miguel Ruiz

Our role or image is what we portray to others, and we're seen by others as this role, image, personality. We may be known as weak, strong, needy, resourceful, capable, smart, ornery, kind, selfish, etc. So we live according to this label while our true self lives deep inside with only brief moments of expression. In many cases, without a caregiver's encouragement to express our true self, talents we're born with can get lost and die somewhere inside...like a beautiful voice that never gets to sing.


No matter what role we're given or what personality we develop, the spark of true self will always cry out to be seen, heard, and validated authentically as you...as you were created. Although, at times, we do express our true self, we're so caught up in being who we're not, we don't always notice. Would you like to discover more of you and express more of your true self in your life? Tune in next week for Part 2, and we'll talk about some ways to change our 'I am'.

I wish you a happy journey to self.

Marilyn

Thursday, September 21, 2017

How To Use Difficult Situations To Enrich Your Life Journey

Dear Readers,
First I want to apologize for being gone for several weeks. Since I live in Florida, I spent time before, during, and after hurricane Irma. Trees, limbs, wires, and debris were everywhere, but I rode out the storm and survived without damage to my house or car. I'm grateful, but so sad for others less fortunate. And I ask you to pray for all those who suffered and are still suffering. God bless all.

Now for this week's post as listed in the title.


Imagine that when you wake up each morning a familiar feeling of dread reaches your mind, and your stomach immediately tightens with stress. You fold your hands over your chest and calm yourself enough to get up and go to a job where you have to face the monster who supervises you with criticism, insults, and anything his sick mind conjures up. You would have left long ago, but you love your work, and you keep thinking things will change. But they don't. What would you do in such a situation?

On our journey through life, we each experience painful situations that hold us hostage with no visible way out. These situations can involve health, work, financial issues, damaging relationships, losses, various addictions, whatever causes us pain. We bring some on ourselves, and others invade our orderly world without explanation. And we usually view each one as our all-powerful enemy. We may fight back, or leave the situation. Then another one is sure to come. And we move through life never really free to be who we are. Maybe we need to take a closer look and see what's really happening.

We are continually faced by great opportunities brilliantly disguised as insoluble problems. Lee Iococca

Obstacles in your life are not enemies. They're opportunities to learn, overcome, and grow into more of the person you're meant to be. Without these opportnities, you may never realize the depth of how wonderful you are. At times, the road is painful, but if you meet each encounter with faith and determination, life can be rewarding and meaningful.

Years ago I worked as a Mental Health Therapist in a Psychiatrist's office, and I suffered the same experience as in my opening example. I awoke each morning with dread about going to work. I went to my Minister for help, and she carefully listened, then said, "This man is probably one of the most important teachers you will ever have. Pay attention, learn and grow, and you will be guided to the next plateau in your life." She was right. I saw myself and my situation with new vision, and I finally left for a new rewarding position, as a wiser and happier me.


If you can learn from the worst times of your life, you'll be ready to go into the best times of your life. Unknown

Methods for change:

Meet each difficult situation as an opportunity with willingness to learn and grow from it.
Analyze the situation and your response to it. You can learn a lot about yourself in the way you respond to a negative, even hurtful, situation in your life. The more you learn, the more powerful you become. And your situation's power over you weakens.

Keep asking yourself: What am I supposed to learn from this? Unknown

Go within and examine your attitude and feelings, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Do you feel stressed with worry, fear, anxiety, sadness, anger, forsaken, etc? How immersed are you in your feelings? How clear is your mind? Where is your focus...on the situation, your inner response, or both? Do you view the situation as more than you can handle? Can you call on a Higher Power for help? Question and learn.
You're stronger than you think. Uncover your strengths, and let them shine. Use denials and affirmations ie "I deny that this situation has any power over me. I am strong and unbeatable." This process will reinforce your power.
Create a plan to deal with your situation. Then choose techniques that would work best for you...confronting, accepting, or getting away from it. As you go along, monitor your situation and your response, and know you have a right to the life you want. And make it so. Each time you pass a hurdle, you can look back with a grateful heart to where you were, compared to where you are now. And what you learn now will lift you to a higher place for future encounters.

I wish you happy discoveries on your journey.


Marilyn