Saturday, January 9, 2010

Stop Pushing and Just Let.

This morning while lying in bed sorting through ideas for what I want in my life this year, I felt stress creeping in, spoiling the fun of anticipation. Then I was suddenly interrupted by the words, "Stop pushing--just let." I sat straight up in bed and thanked that inner voice for putting me back on the right path. I'd been creating my own defeating attitude, overwhelmed by doubt and trying to see how and when I could get what I wanted. That's just not the way it works.
A few years ago I was trying hard to get something accomplished, and it felt like I was trudging up a steep mountain getting nowhere. The Minister in my church gave me some good advice. She said, "Remember it's a process, and you have to allow it to unfold in its time, while you do what is yours to do." I followed her wise advice, and it worked out beautifully. So now, years later, I forget to remember what I need to remember? Duh. Well, that's okay. I can begin again and get it right this time.
There's not much I want materially, but I would really like to have a pair of brown shoes. Yeah, brown shoes. Not heelless, high heels or thongs. Just a good pair of comfortable shoes with laces. Brown seems hard to find. Something else I want is a clean house. This place is a real mess. I'm dealing with some health challenges, and I don't have enough energy now to vacuum, mop floors etc. Which reminds me...I'd like to have my health back. I want energy to get on my treadmill again and keep time with the music while I walk. Oh, heaven! And I want to be with people more. And be able to work in the yard. I started a flower garden last year, but couldn't take care of it. But this year, I want another one, and I want to find ways to keep it healthy.
You know what? This is starting to be fun, letting my ideas just flow. It actually feels possible. And that's the first step. So what I want now is to slow up, take it easy, and let the process work. I still have to think about what I want to be and do this year. Gosh, this is a tall order, but I'm up to it.
I wish everyone love, peace, vision and patience.
Marilyn

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