Tuesday, January 26, 2016

Say Yes To Freedom Through Forgiveness

Each of us is on our individual journey through life, and many of our choices were programmed as children. So we developed a personality. And many of us take life for granted, rarely questioning where we're going until we get old and wonder where it went. We forget to be who we really are. And who we really are is the best part.

Freedom is a possession of inestimable value. Marcus Tullius Cicero

On your journey, how are you living your life? do you ever seriously think about who you are underneath and what's important to you. What do you value in your life, tangible and intangible? I greatly value freedom...freedom to be the kind of person I want to be and to express in ways I choose.

Every experience you've encountered is written inside, the good energy that makes you smile and the negative energy that makes you cry. That's where you keep your anger and resentment toward the people and situations that have hurt you,..and your regret and condemnation over your own imperfection. But things like that don't stay buried. Every once in a while they break loose and bombard your mind and the pit of your stomach. Every time you think of a particular person or situation, you relive pain from the past, and when you think of your own shortcomings, you feel regret and disappointment. It's like a stifling non-forgiving prison to which you've sentenced yourself.

Forgiveness is for yourself because it frees you. It lets you out of that prison you put yourself in. Louise Hay

Sometimes you put all these feelings in a corner of your mind and pretend they're not there, or you rationalize and say you have a right to feel the way you do. And maybe that's true. But unforgiveness binds you to the person or situation that hurt you and to your own negative feelings about yourself. And you see no way out of your bondage.

It is not hard to make decisions once you know what your values are. Roy Disney

Letting go of negative feelings about a person, a situation, or about yourself is difficult, but it can only be done by you. So it's wise to know your values and be willing to work toward your freedom. Do you value a clear mind, a heart that's free to love yourself and others, peace in your soul, and a life that leaves you free to be who you are? Think of how you want to live your life, and begin creating your freedom with forgiveness.

Forgiveness and love are 2 sides of the same coin. When you forgive, you are free to love. And when you love, you are free to forgive. So both are involved in the process of forgiving. How you choose to do this is up to you. Some say it's easier to forgive others and situations, some say it's yourself. The sequence doesn't matter. But bring your feelings to the surface, and forgive with love in your heart.

Anger begets more anger, and forgiveness and love lead to more forgiveness and love. 

Think of situations in your life in which you feel resentment, frustration, etc...situations regarding illness, relationships, money, home, work, time, etc. Tell them you're withdrawing your negative feelings, and you're sending forgiveness and love. You accept what you can't change, and you claim your own freedom from pain where they're concerned.
Think of people you want to forgive, and use much the same dialogue. Withdraw your negative feelings toward them, send forgiveness and love, claim your own freedom from pain, wish them well, and let them go.
Take a good look at yourself. What is there about you that's difficult to forgive? And is it really that bad? Replace painful feelings with forgiveness and love for yourself, and see yourself filled and surrounded with a bright light of healing love, knowing you are healed and free. And claim your freedom with gratitude.

Do what you can to remedy situations in your life, send love to anyone or anything that needs your forgiveness, and never exclude yourself from the process. These steps may take practice and time, but once you free yourself, be aware of any future need, and resolve it quickly. You are beautiful, and you are free.

I wish you much peace with yourself and others.


Monday, January 18, 2016

How To Turn Fear Into Courage And Make It Work For You

Do you have a dream...something you want to be, do, or have, but you can't move past the fear gnawing in your belly? We all go through times of fear. Some may be small daily issues when we're not sure what to expect, like forgetting an appointment or having the boss over for dinner. Or major ones that almost immobilize you, like job loss, divorce, illness, returning to school, etc. You conjure up what-ifs in your mind, and fear can destroy you. But it can also open doors for outcomes you want in your life when you find the courage to move ahead.

Ten years ago I was dealing with a health challenge, but my search for a cause brought no answers. And fear of the unknown took over my life. Then I had a totally unrelated car wreck and spent 2 months in a nursing home for rehab. Really bad experience, but I learned a valuable lesson about fear from a Psychologist in the nursing home. And fear became a catalyst for courage I didn't know I had.

A ship is safe in harbor, but that's not what ships are for. William G. T. Shedd

You can live with fear and the regrets that follow, or you can choose to take command, replace the fear with courage, and live the life you're meant to live. There are steps you can take to address each situation. But first you need to know yourself well enough to understand what you're afraid of.

Fear, to a great extent, is born of a story we tell ourselves. Cheryl Strayed

Explore and clarify your fears in 3 areas:
1. Being. Are you afraid to express who you really are? Afraid others will judge you negatively, not accept you? You'll feel awkward, not measure up? What would you risk being yourself?
2. Doing. When situations arise, do you jump right in or hold back, afraid you're incompetent, you'll make a mistake, or fail? What about the unexpected or unknown? What would hold you back from taking a chance on something you really wanted?
3. Having. Do you have any fear of having what you want? Are your dreams too lofty, out of your reach, you couldn't handle having them, or you don't deserve them? And what would people say about you? You're selfish?

Think of the stories you've written about yourself. Explore your beliefs and feelings, and identify your fears. Then you can tame them as they arise in different situations and be free of the fear burden.

We consider fear our enemy, and our first impulse is to push it down somewhere hoping it will disappear. But your fear is about a belief you've created in your mind (one of those stories you tell yourself about being, doing, and having) that's holding you back from a more rich, rewarding experience in your life. And you need to examine it and make necessary changes. Norman Vincent Peale says, "Change your thoughts and you change your world." So it's wise to embrace fear as something that's there to help you and allow your courage to spring forth.

The beautiful thing about fear is, when you run to it, it runs away. Robin Sharma

Now it's time to talk to your fear and, using denials and affirmations, talk to the situation that's causing your fear. Repeat several times.
1. Fear: Thank you, fear, for helping me see what I need to do. Now I no longer need you, so I let you go.
2. Denial: Describe your situation, and say, "You are no more than a fly on a horse's rump, (or something like that) and I deny that you have any negative power over me or my life."

3. Affirmations: I declare and affirm my clear mind and the courage to face this situation. I am strong and determined, and free to be who I am, to do what is mine to do, and to have peace and goodness in my life. I release all fearful thoughts and move forward.

In your denials and affirmations, use your own words, and allow this method to restore the courage you were born with. This method works, and it gives you tools you need when fear invades your life.

I wish you ease in saying goodbye to fear.


Tuesday, January 12, 2016

You Are More Than You Think You Are. Claim It.

Do you remember who you were before the world told you who you should be? Danielle LaPorte

When I was a child there were days when life wasn't what I wanted it to be. Like all children, sometimes I got sick, or I cried, or I got angry. But something inside told me I had a choice, and I could be and do anything I wanted...with my child mind. So I went on wonderful trips around the world. I rode on airplanes, and climbed the highest mountains. I flew like an eagle and sang like an angel, and I saw whales leap out of the sea in Alaska. Then I looked around my own little world and watched butterflies flit from one flower to another, or laid on the grass and made figures in the clouds, or danced to Glen Miller's latest tunes. I was a beautiful goddess exploring a beautiful world.

For a while I knew who I was. But then my world began to change. After my father died, we moved up north, and kids made fun of me because I had a southern accent, and I felt I didn't belong. Then at home being a good girl meant doing what I was told, And the strict do and don't rules interrupted my daydreams. Who I was supposed to be was clearly set out for me. I had to grow up. And I forgot to be who I used to be.

Every child has a story, and no two are alike. Over time, our own individual experiences mold us into what our environment requires, and we identify with who we think we are. This identity becomes so much a part of us, we rarely question the authenticity of this delusion. In our mind we become someone we're not, and we oftentimes forget who we truly are.

In everyday conversation, it's difficult to speak without using the words 'I am'. But these are tricky, and they're powerful.They imply that you are what you're claiming with 'I am', such as 'I am'sick, cold, fed up, scared, etc. But the illness, the cold, the fed up, the scared, etc are not you. You may be experiencing these things, but they're only what you're dealing with or feeling. Don't claim them with 'I am'. You can't avoid the words altogether, but use them wisely, and don't claim anything you don't want.

Close your eyes and imagine the best version of you possible. That's who you really are, let go of any part of you that doesn't believe it. C. Assaad

Do you remember when you were a child and you jumped and played and sang songs and daydreamed? Oh, I know, there were difficult times, but remember the good ones. What was that like? And where did that little child go? When you think about you, can you see and feel the innocence you once felt? If you asked yourself who and what you are, what would your answer be? Would you say, "I am God's beautiful precious child, created in love, with all I need to be happy and to express happiness to others"? What would you say?

We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures. Thornton Wilder. 

Most of us know who we are, but we're very busy, and we don't much think about it. But your inner child knows. What a miracle it would be for you to awaken your inner child and recapture that miracle part of you, that part that can replace chaos with peace, soften conflict with love, comfort sorrow with joy.

Yes, we have to grow up and function in the adult world, but if we're to live as we're meant to live, the source from which we function must be from our true authentic self. Reconnect with the knowledge of who you are, and claim it. Mandy Hale says, "You don't always need a plan. Sometimes you just need to breathe, trust, let go and see what happens."

I wish you beautiful moments with your wonderful self.


Monday, January 4, 2016

Your New Year Belongs To You. Claim It.

You're entering a new year. How do you approach a gift like this? Do you take the time to examine what's going on in your life and what you may want to change or make better? Do you recognize the power you have to mold and create wonderment in this time you're been given, or do you just say, "Oh, well. Just another year of the same old stuff?"

Now is the time to look at your life and decide what you want to do with it. You've been given a brand new year to create new blessings in your life and to expand on what you already have...a time to be and do and grow into more of what your heart desires. As you enter this year, bring the good stuff with you, the love, the peace, the fun times, your creativity, everything that made you happy last year. But don't contaminate this new year with old baggage from the past. Clean up anything painful that you haven't already released, and let it go. Be done with it. Allow...allow yourself to start out with a new bucket.

For last year's words belong to last year's language and next year's words await another voice. And to make an end is to make a beginning.  T.S.Eliot

No one goes through life without those unexpected challenges that throw us flat on the ground and make it hard to get back up. But each of us has untapped resiliency, strength, and determination that can absolutely amaze us if we recognize and affirm it right off. So let this affirmation be your first claim for your new year. "I am blessed with all the power I need to make all aspects of this year better than any before."

When people go on a motor trip they usually know where they want to go, and they plan how to get there. Otherwise they may end up lost in the boondocks. Well, certainly where you're going this year deserves the same attention and planning. No matter how you may plan it, you'll take detours along the way. But that's okay. You're far better off with a plan than without one. So this will take some serious thinking.

Now is the time to clarify what you're dealing with, where you want to go this year, and a plan for direction to get there. And this year, if you're serious about being a determining factor in the quality of your life, your plan needs to be on paper. Some people hate to make lists. But I'm a list person. I hate feeling overwhelmed with stuff running around in my head, so I put it on paper. Then I'm free to play, and get back to it when I need to. And it keeps me in charge.

It's important to consider your outer world and your inner world. Take some quiet time to examine your outer life issues, your relationships, your work, your health, finances, what you want to create. Then look within to your inner self, qualities that work for you, those on which you want to improve, and others you want to change or release. Now list each item on paper, decide what you want to do with each one, and work out a strategy of action to create a better, more rewarding life and successfully meet challenges as they come.

This doesn't need to be complicated or tedious...just a handy reminder. Once you've taken the time and effort to create your plan, most of your work is done. Now as you go along each day, you can look at your 'what and how' lists. And if you sometimes weaken, you can affirm to yourself, "This is a new year, and I'm now in the driver's seat. I know what I want, and I know how to get there. I am awesome." And every night say, "Thank you, Universe, for all your help."

I wish you much happiness with your new creation.